A
systematic conflict resolution argument is organized in six steps and always
focuses on cooperation and communication.
1. Even before beginning a discussion, you should start by
controlling your own emotions in order to be able to deal with the
argument objectively.
2. At the outset, create a
constructive
discussion environment. The core elements are politeness, honesty,
straightforwardness and also organizing the general framework (eliminate
disturbances, avoid time pressure, etc.). The reason for the discussion will
also be addressed here. It is also the time to explain what the goal of the
conversation is.
3.
Openness and confidence building
are the main aspects of the third discussion step. By clearly stating the
reason for the conflict - without engaging in a direct dialog - both parties
will come to a mutual understanding. It is important to communicate very
precisely and listen attentively to the counterpart. Paying attention and, if
necessary, asking questions should help avoid misunderstandings. Use
"I" sentences to present your own point of view. Generalizing,
criticizing, pleading and making suggestions regarding your preferred solutions,
must be avoided at all costs.
4. This step concentrates mainly on the
actual
conflict resolution dialog. The goal is to find a solution together to
resolve the problem, creating a win-win situation for both parties. It is
crucial that the conversation is based on mutual respect. Accepting different
points of view, as well as the needs and interests of your counterpart is also
extremely important. Listening actively, conscious processing and reacting are
the discussion's main features. The idea is to clarify the facts and the
emotional reasons for the conflict, to illustrate the background and find the
core of the conflict. Avoid provocation!
5. The fifth phase describes the end of the discussion. Both parties will reach
an
agreement together and ensure
that acceptable solutions, which were found during the discussion, will be
applied. In addition, the parties will outline the results of the argument so
far, express and evaluate their requests, and give them tangible form for
practical implementation. The agreements are once again explicitly summarized
and set. The parties agree on further actions. It is important not to jump to a
conclusion! All the details should be discussed in depth. At this stage it is
also possible to take things up a level and talk about the discussion in
itself.
6. The final stage focuses on what will happen once the discussion is over. The
idea is to
come to terms with the
results on a personal level, as well as process and accept them. Among
other things, it is time to leave the feeling of revenge and disappointment
behind. The goal is to mentally and seriously concur with what has been agreed.
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