Rebukes, reproaches or put-downs – unfortunately we don’t
always have the right response to hand. Read on to learn how the
following techniques can help in such situations.
1. The 'yes-exactly' technique
Every reproach is
ostensibly in response to offense. If, for example, you are criticized for
having an untidy desk, the hidden agenda is to be tidier. Respond to the
criticism here by initially acknowledging it but then developing it further …
2. Impress with quotations
You are under attack. Or you find yourself in an unusual situation. Whatever.
And you just happen to have a great quotation on the tip of your tongue. What
could be better? If it is appropriate for the situation, then brilliant; if
not, well it doesn’t really matter because elegantly dropped into your response
it is guaranteed to knock your counterpart off balance…
3. The 'thank you-likewise' technique
The ’thank you-likewise’ technique is based on polite irony. In its simplest
form, respond with “Thank you, likewise!" Give your opposite number an
apparently friendly taste of their own medicine …
4. Let ambivalences lie
If you use this technique, you are, to a certain extent, tolerance personified.
Logic dictates that many people try very hard to resolve conflict situations. A
neutral stance often gives you the advantage …
5. The ‘positive-negative-unexpected’
technique
The first rule here is to retain or reclaim freedom of action, to act and not
to react automatically. It is about dealing with the response reflex,
overcoming the initial shock and triggering the same response reflex in the
other party using questions.
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